You like that?
I know you like it.
You want to touch it?
You can't touch it. You can't touch it.
You want more?
Hmm. What are you gonna give me?
I'll fucking wreck you.
- No, really. I'll fuck you up.
Looks like someone pulled an all-nighter.
For fun or profit?
I think you're right.
I think my sister is after us.
Okay.
Dale does make three,
but that doesn't mean there's a larger safety issue.
Today's Summer Solstice Nature Run will proceed as planned,
and I assume Kani Kani Festival, as well.
I can't comment on suspects.
I'm in close contact with the town council on all of this.
These crimes have no connection with any cult activity.
So don't fucking go there, Jerry.
We have enough real shit to deal with.
God.
- You know it was Kelly Craft. - What?
Yeah, everyone knows that she was in close contact with Dale.
And she lit Coach's car on fire last year.
That was a bunch of Waialua Bulldogs, so why don't
- you do your job...
...and I'll do mine?
- What are you doing? - Uh, you're right.
You should, uh... yeah, you should
probably get back to work.
- Seriously? - See ya.
Hey, Courtney.
It's Monday.
Yup.
You probably shouldn't have fucked him.
Yeah, way to state the obvious.
I'm just saying,
I don't think she's forgiven you,
or she wouldn't have sent it to us.
What am I supposed to do?
I don't know.
I didn't even know her.
I mean, does she even have an Insta?
Yeah, I don't think I knew her, either.
Well, you did always say she was jealous 'cause
your dad loved you more, and you're smarter
and hotter, and, you know, just better.
Yeah.
I mean, I-I did some pretty fucked-up shit to her, too.
For instance, left her in that cave.
Tea.
And used her name for my porn account.
Yeah, that was a little mean, too, but...
it's not like she had anything to lose if anyone found it.
I mean, she had no life, except
- she did fucking love him. - And you really think
she'd kill all of those people just to get back at me?
Maybe.
I mean, she was hella mysterious,
like a sad little Phantom of the Opera.
Which makes it really hard to figure out what she wants.
Well, you're the only one who can.
Got to go deal.
Stay safe.
Seriously.
I...
could not handle losing you.
- [ I used to surround...
- That's cute. - It's hot.
Gonna make bank off that one.
More?
Uh, yes, please.
- Come on. - Oh, thank you.
- Happy grad night to us.
You realize this is, like, the end of an era.
I mean, it's kind of, like, our last night together.
Is Baby Margot getting all emo? It's cute.
Hey, I just want to celebrate us,
- or whatever.
Ah, fuck. So annoying.
I have my own fucking life to lead.
Psycho twin again?
- Yeah. - Ugh.
"Where are you?
- Did you leave without me?"
Oh, my God. She so wishes she was you.
It's kind of sad.
Yeah.
I mean, she's always kind of sad.
I think she does have, like, um, legit depression, though.
- Bitch, don't we all?
But not tonight!
- No. - Aw.
Tonight's gonna be so fun.
Fuck yes, it is.
Dylan? What the fuck?
Alison?
Help!
- Hannah?
- Oh, my God. - Riley!
- Oh, Hannah. Ah. - Oh, my God.
You scared me. I thought you were a sex trafficker.
I'm so sorry.
- Are you okay? - Oh, now I am.
And I'm happy to see you, honey.
Oh. I just...
- Oh. - Oh, my God.
- Oh, look who I found. - Jesus, Mom.
Could you put on something, please?
No, I could not. It's nature run.
And I hope you'll both be joining us.
We won't.
I forgot how often your moms just runs around
- naked for no reason. - Where'd you get this?
Found it on one of your crazy-ass salt licks over there.
Do you think Alison left it?
Nature run's about to start.
We should go.
Have a good run.
Okay, runners, get hydrated to avoid chafing.
- Hey. - Hi. Hi, Sarah.
- Arrest Kelly Craft!
Avenge Johnny's death!
- Justice for Coach.
- Justice for Coach! Hey, we know our rights, pig. - Justice for Coach!
- We have permits.
They have a permit.
Okay, we go through this every year, Mom.
It's not indecent exposure. It's a 5K.
No, I do not think Kelly Craft will use it to make her escape.
She has nothing to escape from.
All right, I... I got to get to work now. Bye.
There's an angry mob outside, calling for her arrest.
Well, then tell them to go home.
Sometimes I hate this town.
Of course. Uh, I also put together a victim profile
to circulate to other local communities.
- Okay. - Male,
middle to lower class, age 19 to 35,
reasonably attractive.
Sounds kind of like you.
What do you know about Kelly and Dale?
In what regards?
In regards to their fucking.
I try to stay away from carnal gossip.
Right. Okay.
Well, can you find out the nature of their relationship?
Hey, Wade.
Lyla.
You know how much I hate to disappoint you.
- Ugh. - We all do.
As you can see, major blood vessels
and structures of the neck were severed to remove the head.
And someone wiped it clean of any outside DNA.
Let's crack it open.
I'm sorry?
See if the killer left a message.
I think the message was the head
sitting on your doorstep.
I'm asking you to crack it open.
You're not my supervisor,
unless you went to medical school
when I wasn't looking.
I went to the police academy.
I think Doug might be right.
I don't care if you're dehydrated.
You can't be hanging brain all over here.
- This is a family place.
- ...spicy shrimp.
I was just texting you.
Where the hell were you?
What? I need a permission slip?
I mean, how many times have you gotten up
- to move product? - Okay.
I wouldn't get all Judge Judy on me, I mean, what with
your sex tape floating around.
It was a joke. Okay?
You used to make 'em sometimes?
I don't see what's funny about that.
Okay, I know someone's legit coming to merc us,
but don't you feel like if this is really the end,
we should be having some fun,
instead of moping around, doing nothing?
I'm not doing nothing.
Well, smelling Alison's sweatshirt doesn't count
as actual activity. You know that sweatshirt means
she's coming for you next.
I think she's trying to communicate with me.
Seriously?
If she wanted to talk, why the fuck she block your texts?
We don't know she did.
- Maybe her phone was off. - Dude,
you're supposed to be the smart one.
Use your big-ass brain.
Okay, that sweatshirt wasn't a love letter.
- It was a fucking threat. - If she wanted
to kill me, she could've done it already.
I know she's trying to tell me something.
Oh, my gosh, Dylan.
She fucking killed Johnny, Dale and-and fucking Coach.
Do you seriously have some kind of fantasy
that you two are gonna ride off into the sunset together?
I don't expect you to get it.
Okay, I know that you're not thinking clearly.
I mean, I have Prozac. Do you want Prozac? I mean...
Prozac is for depression.
I'm not depressed.
Just trust me, okay?
You didn't know her like I did.
For real?
I knew her well enough not to fuck her twin sister.
Shit.
What? No. No. No. No.
- Come on!
I thought you'd at least make it
till the end of the day.
She still looks like herself.
I know.
Yeah, Wade thinks she's been gone a long time.
She probably got caught in one of the lava tubes
under the cave.
Same thing happened with one of those cult suicides.
This is my fault.
She was depressed.
It's no one's fault.
We can do an official autopsy,
but her injuries are consistent
with the impact caused by a jump, so...
She's been through enough.
I'm sorry.
I just want her back.
At least we don't have to lie anymore.
Are you fucking kidding me?
The cops said
she's been dead this whole time.
- Sorry. No offense. - Offense taken.
Her dead sister's body just washed up next to her.
I said sorry.
I mean, I... I knew she was dead,
but seeing her like that...
It reminds us all of what we did.
At least the police ruled it a suicide,
so whoever's after us can't blame us anymore.
Whoever's after us wasn't threatening
to call the cops.
They were threatening to kill us, which means
they are still fully out there trying to kill us.
Who else saw us that night?
Dale's dead,
so... that just leaves us.
Or someone we don't know about.
So, what? They're trying to punish us
like they're fucking God?
Or they want revenge.
Or one of the many other reasons psychopaths kill.
I mean, have you never listened to a podcast?
It's understandable to want revenge.
I'm just saying it makes sense.
Yeah, maybe in, like, theory, but,
I mean, Alison didn't have any friends.
She had me.
We all saw how there for her you were.
Are you legit shading me right now?
Oh, everyone knows you didn't give a shit about her.
You have no idea what I felt about my sister.
Yeah, I do, because I loved her.
And you knew it.
That's why you fucked me that night.
You fucked me to fuck her.
And I fell for it.
And now she's dead.
And I'll never fucking forgive you.
So many feelings.
That's what happens when you take someone's V card.
Sorry.
Oh, my God.
Can we circle back around
to who the fuck is trying to kill us?
Hi, Bruce.
Clara.
What can I do for you?
They found my daughter's body today.
Must be very upsetting.
Cut the crap.
How long did you have her?
About a year.
Just kept hoping things would turn out differently.
- Should have told me. - Why? So you could
tell me I was full of shit?
- She's my daughter. - I waited for the solstice,
but she's not the one.
So I did what I had to do.
I left you the necklace.
I deserve to know where she was,
what happened to her.
My loyalty's not to you, Bruce.
I prepared your daughter to enter the next life
free from the burdens of this one.
You should be happy.
- She's getting
the chance at redemption we never will.
This has got nothing to do with us.
Everything's connected.
Do you know what it was like for her sister to find her body?
At least her twin mate is finally free.
She don't quite see it that way.
Well, hopefully, she will someday.
I've protected you for a long time, Clara.
Do not fuck with my daughter.
I protected you, too, Bruce.
My God.
Hey, Doug.
- You bring us some cold ones? - I heard you were
transporting some of the arachnoids to the mainland.
Came to assist.
Yeah, well, your cooler ain't gonna cut it.
What you got for me?
I did some digging regarding your earlier inquiry about, um,
Dale's relations with Kelly Craft.
They were, in fact... carnal.
Ah, shit.
I won't be able to live with my mother
if she's right about this.
I live with my mother, too.
Cool.
Um, it seems that, uh, Dale was also having carnal,
as well as other inappropriate types of relations,
with... many... people.
Great. Talk to all of them,
and let's get Kelly's phone records and bank statements.
Compare them with Dale's. You know the drill.
I do know the drill, ma'am, and I love it.
And I love that about you, Doug.
Hey.
My funeral is tomorrow.
Jesus.
Sorry.
Can't do it.
Of course.
No, I-I mean it.
Uh, you...
You want to not go? You want to...
You want me to cancel?
Just... tell me what you need.
I don't know. It's my fucking funeral.
I'm about to be dead forever.
I never should have pushed you into this.
No, I-I did it. I lied.
I just...
Just so fucking tired.
What if I don't want to be her anymore?
Well, uh...
You can't be Alison... unless you want to go to jail.
You'd have to start over someplace
where no one knew who you were.
Even then, you'd always be...
hiding something.
I just wish I could go back, and-and not get in that car,
and-and not say I was her and never go to the fucking party.
Oh, hey. I'm sorry. Hey.
She's not who we thought she was.
Lennon.
What do you mean?
She, um...
she hurt people.
I'm-I'm hurting people.
People are getting hurt.
That's what sucks about being an adult.
No matter what you do, people are gonna get hurt.
You just do what you think is right.
And what if I don't know what that is?
You'll have to figure it out.
Where did you get that?
Someone found it on the beach.
No matter what you decide...
...it gets easier.
I know you see the uniform,
and you think it's all glamour and glory.
Take this bank statement.
Now, your average officer of my rank might not think much
about a bunch of deposits into the account
of a suspected drug dealer,
but these here... they're in Bitcoin.
I understand you're not an expert in cybercurrency,
so trust me when I tell you
it is hard to track.
It was the financials that blew Watergate wide open.
Did you know that... about Watergate?
Your mom should be done soon, Kai.
I'm glad he's dead.
The asshole cheated on me with a 15-year-old football player.
Johnny was 19.
Same fucking shit.
He left me.
He never paid child support.
And people go around acting like he's a hero
and I'm a fucking piece of shit.
Well, I don't think you're a piece of shit, Kelly.
But I need you to explain these texts between you and Dale,
where he offered to,
"Off him if you get him off."
It was a joke.
About murder in exchange for oral sex?
That's my sense of humor.
Come on, Kelly.
You realize this does not look good.
I've got three very violent homicides,
and so far, you're the only common denominator.
- I hate math. - I can't help you
if you won't talk to me.
I blew Dale for free, okay?
He didn't do shit for me.
The only people he did shit for were teenage girls.
Hey. I know I've been MIA lately, but...
Put a finger down if you came back
from your first year of college ready
to have a full-on hot girl summer,
and then your best friend and his hot football coach lover
got brutally murdered, and your friend got, like, decapitated,
and they couldn't find his head forever.
But then, they finally did,
on the same night another guy from your town,
who was low-key kind of sketch,
got murdered in a Slushee machine.
And then, your best friend's twin sister,
who has been missing for, like, a whole year,
shows up in the ocean, dead.
And now you're getting ready to go to her funeral
and pay your respects, and...
you realize...
life is precious,
and friendships need to be cherished.
Because you never know what's gonna happen.
"This Heart is an Ocean"]
But right now, you're just...
really grateful to be alive.
Like or comment for a story time.
- Much better energy
than the last few takes.
It's good for you to keep posting.
A lot of people love you.
They want to be there for you.
- Thanks.
And that filter helped with the flashback.
Miss Margot, it's for you.
Who uses a landline?
You're early.
I know.
I just wanted to apologize.
I fucked up.
That whole night.
Everything I did was wrong.
And now, I wish I had told you.
I'm-I'm sorry, Alison.
I love you.
How'd you know?
I always did.
And all I did was
- fuck it up. - Can you just fucking stop?
Just stop blaming yourself and everyone else
and-and stop being such a dick.
You didn't used to be a dick, Dylan.
We all make choices. People get hurt.
Just suck it up and move the fuck on with your life.
If you really knew Alison, you know that's what she'd say
to you right now if she was here.
What are you doing?
Warming up the shrimp.
That's a salad, with mayonnaise.
You'll poison half the town.
Don't threaten me with a good time.
Afternoon, Chief.
Look who's got her pants on.
- Nice to see you, too, Courtney. - Someone threw a rock
through Kelly's window, no thanks to you.
I can't help her if she doesn't report it.
Can you tell Harold no one likes a cold shrimp?
Not today, Courtney.
Please.
Hey, how you doing?
I'm glad you're here.
- Hi, Chief.
It's not exactly an emergency,
but I was typing up the transcripts
from your interview with Kelly, and I decided
to cross-reference it with Dale's bank statements, and...
I don't think Kelly Craft is our killer.
I tracked a number of recent Bitcoin statements
made to Dale...
from an OnlyFans account.
I'm pretty sure it belongs to the dead girl
who turned up yesterday.
- [
- You tryna tonight?
I mean, it's grad night, right?
- How about Connor Davenport?
- No. Ew. - Connor's hot.
He's, like, literal himbo energy.
I low-key love that for you.
Stop, no. He's actually rout.
Well, I mean, you kind of have to.
There's, like, legit no one else.
Yeah. I guess.
Hot. Want me to tag you?
Whatever.
Connor, hi.
I missed your pretty face.
I'm so sorry.
Thanks for coming.
You know I'm here for you no matter what.
I love you, Lennon.
Thanks, Margot.
You okay?
At least Alison's not in pain anymore.
Hey. Oh.
Um, hello? Did someone do too much blow?
What? No.
Did you forget there's a psycho killer on the loose?
Okay, but we are a funeral,
and you are being high-key disrespectful.
Well, I high-key don't care. I can't find Dylan.
I'm sure he's off somewhere being all depressed and aggro.
- I'm gonna go look for him. - What?
Heaven gained the real angel,
but now you have Alison with you, too.
I'll, uh... I'll be right back.
Hey, Ri.
What are you doing out here?
Got to sneak my smoke breaks
now that Bruce Almighty put his cameras up.
Always trying to put Courtney in the corner.
Yeah. Listen, have you seen Dylan?
You know, I'm not even getting OT for this crap?
Fucking Harold riding my ass.
No, it sucks.
Um...
- Okay, I got to go find Dylan. - Wait.
Can you help your mom out?
Thanks, Riri.
You're my girl.
How are you doing, sweetheart?
I know it's hard, but trust me, it's not over.
Your spirits will meet again.
I'm so sorry.
I just want you to know that Margot and Carl and I
will always be here for you.
You're family.
Thanks, Mei.
Coming to you live from this funeral.
And guys, it's, like, super sad.
So I guess I just wanted to say, like,
this one's for everyone we lost.
Rest in power.
I'm high-key disrespectful?
That was a tribute.
Chill... out.
I saw your sad boy down at the beach.
Where are you going?
Ladies. I chugged, like,
a gallon of water with, uh,
cayenne and honey before I got here.
- Uh...
- You should probably go.
such a vision, oh...
I guess I should've locked the door.
Why? You obviously wanted me to see.
I mean, you've recorded the whole thing.
I'm just being me, making love and making money.
This is so supremely fucked, even for you.
I'll clean the sheets, okay?
I mean, it's not like he bled.
Though he was definitely a virgin.
no controllin' him,"...
You are full-on Villanelle right now.
I can't even. I mean,
this is beyond attention-seeking behavior.
Okay. Therapy time with Margot.
Come on, read me.
You do this all the time.
Fucking hurt people and then act like it's all a joke.
Well, it's high-key not funny.
I talked to my therapist about it,
and I understand how hard it is for you to be vulnerable.
She thinks it makes total sense
because of what happened with your mom.
My mom is dead, and I like to fuck,
and that's that on that.
Do you know how full of shit you sound?
I get it.
Okay? You're scared I'm gonna go to USC and forget about you.
Oh, my God. Margot, I know this might be hard
for you to comprehend,
but not everything is about you, okay?
Just having fun.
So you fucked
the guy your sister has been in love with forever?
In my bed?
And recorded it? For fun?
Can you not see how psychotically fucked that is?
I do fucked-up shit all the time.
It doesn't mean anything.
- I don't believe you. - I don't give a shit.
You can push me away all you want,
but I know you.
I know you love me.
she knows this...
And I love you, too.
If you knew me at all,
you'd know that I don't give a single flying fuck about you.
"She knows this"...
What are you doing?
Uh, nu-nothing.
Harold makes the best red velvet.
- Mmm.
Def not keto.
I just wanted to say that I'm-I'm sorry.
To me?
You've always been there for me, and... I don't...
I don't know what was wrong with me, but I just... I did...
I did a lot of fucked-up shit.
Um, I'm sorry.
Mm.
Uh, sorry to interrupt.
I was looking for you.
Well, you found me.
Are you ready to say goodbye?
Yeah.
Excuse me.
- What's that? - What's going on?
Back up. Back up.
Everyone step back.
Oh, shit.
Oh, my...
I'm not cleaning it up.
Whee!